How to have an open discussion about suicide with your teen

Our teens are some or another way connected to someone who attempted suicide or died by suicide. But how do you talk about suicide if your teen is not suicidal? This article will give you a few pointers to have an informal discussion about suicide with your teen.

Set up the stage

Both you and your teen need to be in the right space of mind when you have this discussion. Some parents find the best time is while they are driving back home. If there was a suicide at school or in the news, you could ask the teen if the school talked about it and what is their thoughts about it.

Break the stigma about mental health

Depression is often associated with suicide. Remind your teen depression are treatable and no different from diabetes or high cholesterol. There is no shame in seeking medical care when you are sick or in physical pain, and it should be similar to mental health disorders. Our digestive system, eyes, spine, and muscles sometimes need professional medical care; why would the brain be different?

Take all suicide threats seriously

Friends or classmates might be fixated on death or drop comments like “I want to die” or “It is not worth living.” Let your teen know it is okay to talk about suicide with friends, and they won’t give friends any “ideas” as falsely believed. You can also give your teen the language to have these discussions, such as “ I am worried about you. You are talking a lot about death the last few days, and I wonder if you think about hurting or killing yourself?”

I know we don’t want to expose our teens to these situations. However, it is most likely they are connected to someone who is suicidal, and it is best to give them the tools to manage these situations. All threats of suicide are serious, and teens can tell a parent, teacher, school counselor, or doctor if their friends are suicidal.

The difference between tattling and protecting

Even if their friends ask them not to tell anyone, it is important to inform a responsible adult about the situation. Their friend might be mad at them, but it is necessary to protect their friends from suicide.

Remind them you care

Remind your teen that you love and deeply care about them. Let them know you are available, and they can talk to you no matter what happens.

Resources

Let your teen know there are resources available for people who are suicidal. These resources are:

Common Ground at 1-800-231-1127

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255

These guidelines will help you to have a meaningful discussion with your teen about suicide. If you are concerned that your teen is suicidal, schedule a mental health evaluation with a therapist who specializes in teens or visit your local emergency room. You can read about the warning signs here.

Information on this website is provided for information purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for the advice provided by a mental health therapist or other healthcare professional. No information offered here should be interpreted as a diagnosis of any disorder, nor an attempt to treat or prevent or cure any disease or condition. Names, characters, places, and incidents on this website are for illustrative purposes only. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.